Thursday Thirteen #20

Milestone: this is my 200th post!

Hi, everyone! We're back in Texas and busily trying to catch up with life - and sleep! I've received dozens of blog comments, emails and snail mail cards during the past week and will be working to respond to them all over the next few days. Until I am able to respond, please know that I appreciate each and every prayer, positive thought, and remembrance.

And now...this week's Thursday Thirteen.

Thirteen Favorite Memories of my Father

1. Breakfasts in Ocean City
   I've written several times about my special memories from Ocean City, New Jersey, but this memory specifically focuses on all of the times my Dad and I shared a breakfast together. Whether it was a short walk to our favorite neighborhood cafe, a drive to the other end of the island and the sit-down restaurant, or a bike ride up the boardwalk to an ocean-side eatery, we often enjoyed starting our days together.
2. Jeopardy
   Because of the hours my Dad's grocery store kept, he was often home in time to watch Jeopardy, which came on every night at 7:30. Many times, he'd walk in the door just in time for the show to start and I'd dog his heels all the way to the TV so we could challenge each other over who would get the most answers.
3. 5th Grade Basketball
   No, I didn't play. Have you met me? I'm short. But in the 5th grade, my elementary school had two basketball tournaments...one a father/son, the other a mother/daughter. At the father/son tournament, my Dad staged a "fight" with one of the refs over a supposedly bad call, to give himself an excuse to make donation to the school when the ref levied a fine. I've never laughed so hard in my life. Literally. It's a fabulous memory.
4. Statue of Liberty
   During the summer between third and fourth grade, I had the awesome opportunity to play my violin at Carnegie Hall. Instead of going in and out of the city just for the concert, my family made a vacation of it. One of our sightseeing stops was the Statue of Liberty...and although my Mom had less than zero interest in trekking to the top, my Dad gamely trudged up about a million steps with me, alternating between encouraging me to keep walking as I got tired and actually pushing me up the stairs when I became absurdly paranoid of the spiral steps near the top.
5. Breakfasts in Mountainhome
   Yeah, that'd be my hometown. Dad went to the Diner nearly daily for breakfast...and it was always special when he took me along. As a somewhat big fish in a small pond, everyone knew Dad, and it was always neat to visit with all the other tables and early morning diners. Breakfast is my favorite meal of the day. :-)
   
6. Generosity
   My Dad was one of the most generous people I've ever met. In his grocery store, if someone at the checkout came up a buck or two short on paying for their order and Dad knew that they were in a tight spot or needed a bit of help, he always reached into his own wallet to finish paying for their food. No matter what organization in the area came around looking for financial or in-kind help, Dad was first in line, signing up with a monetary donation or arranging to provide whatever food was needed for a planned event. If our volunteer fire department was called out on a middle of the night fire, Dad invariably went down to the store and gathered up supplies to take to the fire hall so the guys would have something waiting for them to snack on when they pulled back in. Every single time in my life that I talked to Dad after I moved away from home, his last question was if I needed any money...even after Alzheimer's moved him past the point of managing his own money. I rarely took him up on the offer, always having preferred to pay my own way, but I also always knew that I'd have my Dad's support if I needed it.
7. Peppi, the Yorkshire Terrier
   I begged and pleaded for years to get a dog when I was a kid. Finally...we got a Yorkie. But as much as the little two pound mutt loved me, he was always my Dad's dog. From the moment Dad got home from work at night until he left again the next morning, that dog followed his every step. And Dad loved him just as much...taking him on walks, letting him sleep in the bed, and even holding the puppy on his lap for car trips.
8. Burnt Eggs
   You'd think that because my dad owned/operated a grocery store for 40+ years, he'd be great with food. And he absolutely was. Unless he had to cook it. I'll never forget one Saturday night when my Mom went out to a Philharmonic concert with one of her girlfriends and my Dad asked me what I wanted for dinner. For some reason, I asked for scrambled eggs. He tried. He really did. But they were blackened. And hard. Guess who ate cereal for dinner? Still a fun memory, though!
9. Las Vegas
   Back in 1995, the 'fam headed out to California for Andrea's wedding. Mom had to leave soon after the big day to take care of a sick sister in Florida, but Dad and I stayed out West for another couple weeks. As a side trip, we flew to Las Vegas for about 4 days, to meet up with my Uncle Louie and Aunt Peg, who were also there on vacation. We had a blast! Mind you, I'd spent a good part of my childhood in casinos in Atlantic City, but for many reasons, those few days in Vegas were just that much more special. Plus, I won a bunch of cash. Cash is good. When you're 14. And in a casino. Where they don't care that you're 14. Haha!
10. Driving
    I can't begin to imagine how many miles I spent driving with my Dad...but despite my frustration with his tendency to drive slower than the limit, it was always a good time spent together and we had many long and in-depth conversations, whether on the way to school and back, or headed down to the Jersey shore.
11. Meeting Chris
    Living 1600 miles from my parents, they didn't get to meet Chris until we'd already been dating for over a year. In fact, we were already engaged and living together before we finally got up to PA. I think every girl in the world is a bit apprehensive when they take someone home to meet Dad...but it couldn't have gone any smoother the first time Dad met Chris. They started talking immediately (Chris was primed to understand Dad's Alzheimer's and to understand that a story might be 30 years old instead of recent...) and really hit it off. Color me way happy!
12. Dancing at my wedding
    I was really worried that Dad wouldn't be in very good condition for my wedding. And although he certainly wasn't in great shape, he was still able to walk me down the aisle, and then dance with me at the reception. It made me cry then...and now it's making me cry again now...but we really had a great dance.
    
13. Poppa and the Bunny
    When Dad really went downhill so quickly in early March, we'd only found out a few weeks before that we were expecting a baby. We hadn't told anyone about baby yet...but decided, when we went to PA in such a hurry, that Dad would be the first to know. When we got to the nursing home to see Dad, Mom and I went down the hall to have a little discussion. While gone, Chris asked Dad if he could tell him a secret...and Chris claims up one side and down the other that my Dad responded my saying "tell me." (My skepticism comes from the fact that Dad was already almost entirely non-responsive and uncommunicative by the time we got to PA.) Chris told Dad that we had a baby on the way and says that in response, Dad squeezed his hand and a tear slid down his cheek. After that, Chris says that he asked Dad what he would like the baby to call him, and offered a few possible options, before Dad apparently agreed to be called Poppa. If you have followed my How to Have a Baby blog, you may have read the story about the stuffed bunny Chris bought for the baby when he found out we were expecting. So before we left PA on that trip to head back to Texas, Chris took a picture of Dad and I and the bunny. So although you can't see her, this picture is the only one Catherine will have with her Poppa. But you can bet we'll share lots of stories to make sure she knows what a special man her grandfather was!