Introducing...the Flashing Light

Good Tuesday morning to everyone, and welcome to Tuesday Travel Tips with Tiffany! To read previous editions, you can find them here.

The entrance to my neighborhood is guarded by a flashing red light.  Not stop signs; nope, those are too mundane.  Not a full traffic signal.  Too structured.  All four spokes of the intersection are governed by this flashing light.

And you would think people needed a PhD in Trafficology to figure out this modern-day Clash of the (Nissan) Titans!

Ok, people.  Let's break it down for you.

Basically...someone who wanted to make money off lightbulbs instead of sheet metal transformed the STOP SIGN into a FLASHING RED STOP LIGHT.

Beyond that, the principle is the same.  Exactly the same.  We take turns once we get to the intersection.  The first Eastbound/Westbound cars in the corresponding lanes go...and then the Northbound/Southbound cars go.

But most importantly, and why you people tick me off, is this point of driving etiquette:

If no one is currently at the intersection, and I get there before you do, I get to go through first.  Period.

Let's recap.

If my wheels have come to a stop and yours have not, I was there first.  And thus, I get to cross the intersection first.  Period.

Here's another scenario that gets my gall.

If you're the second car in line, you don't get to go through the intersection at the same time as the first car in line.

We take turns, Bozo.  My toddler is learning how to do that; why can't you?

I've heard the argument that some people might not realize that it's not an actual fully functional tri-color traffic light.  I'd be willing to accept that argument if it (a) didn't flash 24/7/365, (b) didn't blink on and off in 1 second intervals and (c) I lived near hamsters with less than 1 second attention spans instead of living, breathing, and supposedly attentive human beings.

I don't know about any of the rest of you purportedly sane drivers out there, but when I'm alone in my car (read: no kids), and someone goes through the blinking red light intersection out of turn, I actively try to hit them.

Calm down.  I'm not actually going to hit them.  But if they're trying to jump my turn, off goes my horn, out comes my middle phalanges, and I proceed to take my turn.  I definitely stop if they continue through the intersection; no numb-numb is worth wrecking my car (and in the area surrounding my neighborhood, they probably don't have insurance).  But I make 'em work for it.

But Tiffany, why don't you do the Christian thing and forgive?

Heck no.  This isn't a forgiveable offense, and they have no intention of atoning.  Forgetting your turn signal at an intersection is an oopsie.  Going out of turn is deliberate.  Failing to understand basic traffic signals is ignorance.  And ticking me off when I'm in my car is stupid.

How about you?  How do you deal with the Battle of the Stupids when it comes to flashing red lights?

Until next time,

Safe travels!